Lifestyle

On behalf of all women, thanks Miranda Kerr - for nothing

Supermodel Miranda Kerr juggles motherhood and career
Supermodel Miranda Kerr juggles motherhood and career Contributed

ON BEHALF of the female population of the western world, I'd like to give a very big thanks to Miranda Kerr - for nothing.

It's hard enough convincing your hubby that, having carried an actual human being (and many donuts) inside your body for nine months, things don't just snap back into their original position when the baby arrives, without having the likes of supermodel Kerr legging it down the catwalk with everything bouncing in the right places mere months after giving birth to a 10-pound child.

My jaw dropped simultaneously with those across the world when Miranda strutted her stuff as a Victoria's Secret runway model 10 months after the birth of her son, Flynn, in November last year.

Columnist Amanda Coop.
Columnist Amanda Coop. Alistair Brightman

My own bub was only a couple of months old at the time and it's fair to say I was a tad envious of her post-baby figure (let's face it, I would have been a tad envious even if I hadn't just had a bub).

Now, if the Hollywood rumour mills are to be believed (and why wouldn't they be?) she's set to do it all over again - and make scores more of us lament our physical inadequacies.

Kerr has been spotted  wearing a "floaty" dress and emerging from a doctor's appointment (insert melodramatic gasp here) so I guess that's proof enough for all the magazines to run with the story.

I'm hoping Kerr herself and hubby Orlando Bloom would get something a little more concrete, such as a positive pregnancy test or an ultrasound, before sharing the news with their families.

It's hard to tell from the photos of her so-called "bump" whether she's really expecting, since it's still somewhat smaller than my "ate too much over the weekend" bump.

For the record, no magazines have run any photos of me in floaty dresses speculating that I might be about to unleash Coop Jr the Second upon the world (and just as bloody well, since I'm not and every woman knows the most embarrassing thing that can possibly ever happen to you is being mistaken for being up the duff when you're not).

No doubt if she is preggers we'll find out in due course and watch, seething, as she gains the approximate weight of the child, then drops the weight and flies off to Paris to do a bikini shoot all before the placenta has hit the medical waste bin.

I'm not saying Miranda should turn into a fat, stretch-marked blob just to make the rest of us feel better, but it would certainly help if she did.

What happened to the Aussie spirit of taking one for the team, Miranda?

Topics:  birth, editors picks, miranda kerr, model, motherhood, mum




Child found hanging by neck in swing accident

RACQ CQ Rescue has flown two patients to Mackay Base Hospital with suspected spinal injuries after a horror smash at Belyando Crossing early this morning.

Child is in Townsville Hopsital after accident on swing set

NEW STORES: Look what's opening at Stockland

Bed Bath N' Table shop front.

Stockland announces new retailers

Husband and wife team bring taste of Italy to Zilzie

ITALIAN TWIST: Jodi and Rob Mills have recently opened their new restaurant called Bella Sugo at Cocos in Zilzie and business is doing well.

Rob will work magic in the kitchen.

Latest deals and offers

FBI investigating Leslie Jones website hack

The FBI are investigating Leslie Jones' personal website hack

Katy Perry: 'I stay normal with therapy'

Katy Perry says she relies on therapy to help her 'stay normal'

World's highest-paid actor revealed

The highest-paid actors in the world have been revealed

Jessica Alba regrets her tattoos

Jessica Alba regrets getting her tattoos

Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson highest paid actor in world

Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson

Johnson earned almost $20 million more than Jennifer Lawrence

Why Depp and Heard are fighting again

Amber Heard is furious over Depp taking advantage of her generosity

REVEALED: Pat Rafter's $18m Coast house on the market

Check out the photos of the Coast's most expensive property for sale

The "correction we had to have" in Gladstone's rentals

UPWARD MARCH: The rental vacancy rate in Gladstone has improved for the first time in more than a year, providing a confidence boost in the market.

Vacancy rates improve with signs that things are getting betterF

ISLAND FOR SALE: Cheap Fraser Coast island drops price again

Suna Island in the Great Sandy Strait will be auctioned by Ray White Hervey Bay on Saturday morning.

This is the cheapest island you will find for sale in Australia

How a family home can fit on a 250sq m block

This is what you can build on 250m2.

Here's the floor plan of a home built on 250sq m

$100m plan for Curtis Island 'world class' luxury resort

$100 million resort: Top views at Turtle Street at Curtis Island.

"At the moment we think it meets all the town planning approvals.”

Noosa mayor on "red alert" over planning court decision

Mayor Tony Wellington hands down his first budget.

Mayor upset at lack of say about look and feel of Noosa