I HAD a few friends gasp in horror at my column last week, talking about online dating.
They were worried I would have a line-up of blokes waiting at my door, or at least a flood of interest on my profile.
But I told them not to worry, that would never happen.
It's got nothing to do with me personally. It's got everything to do with this column.
After all, who wants to go out on a date with Supermum and have every disastrous detail outlined in the pages of a newspaper in the following days.
Because, let's be honest… first dates are very awkward.
There is so much that can go wrong.
I'm pretty sure everyone has a bad date story to tell.
There's getting stood up for starters.
Then there are the bad starts, like turning up late for the date.
If they picked you up there is always the risk of a car breaking down or worse - being involved in an accident.
The date might be going well, but there are those incidents; food gets spilled or stuck in teeth, the credit card could be declined or either of you could experience an unexpected passing of gas from either end… or worse, they can be totally expected.
What about the dates that are never going to work out?
You know the ones: the know-it-alls, the trying-too-hards, the nose-pickers, the got-nothing-to say dates, the ones too busy ogling the waitress to notice you got up and left, the ask-too-personal-type-of- questions dates, or simply because their restaurant of choice has a drive-through.
A first-date argument is a sure sign things aren't going to be positive in the future either.
Then there are the dates where you run into an ex? Awkward.
It is worse when you find out it was orchestrated by your date to make their ex jealous.
So you see what I mean?
These sorts of events can be bad enough, without the thought I could be writing about them in the latest edition of Supermum and sharing it with the world.
So where does that leave me?
Single and looking for someone who can handle the whole world knowing all the dumb things that will happen.
I think this is a job for Superman.