We've all been here, for some reason you feel the need to text that ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend.
Sometimes there is justification; you want your favourite shirt back or left you house keys on the bedside dresser, but sometimes you just shouldn't go there. So what are the guidelines for such a danger fraught situation?
The Bully and Autostraddle blogger "Liz" are here to help. Here's a five step process for texting your Ex with success.
Step 1: Maybe Don't Text Your Ex
Think, think long and hard. Do I really need to send this message? To make the decision Liz from Autostraddle has put together this checklist to complete before you hit that send button.
1. Are you drunk?
2. Are you sad?
3. Do you just want attention?
4. Are you trying to make someone else jealous?
5. Most importantly, is there someone else you can contact about this issue other than your ex? Maybe an old mutual friend?
If you answered yes to any of the above then bail out now. Liz says there are no exceptions to these rules.
"'That song we both like came on the radio' is not a good reason to text your ex. 'I just saw the Hangover 2 -- remember that time we were hung over?.'is not a good reason to text your ex."
Step 2: Don't Mention You're Not Speaking
Liz says leading into a conversation with an Ex you haven't spoken to for some time may be a little uncomfortable but her advice is to avoid, at all costs, pointing out the recent lack of communication. She says to start off with something a little less formal.
"A better idea is to start with 'Hey.' Hey is the official start of any text to anyone who you don't normally text. "Hey" makes you look nonchalant and cool like Fonzie," she says.
Step 3: Get to the Point
Don't beat around the bush with 'how have you been'. Before you continue on ensure you are really texting you Ex for a reason - check Step One. But if it's unavoidable then Liz's advice is to keep it short, sharp and to the point.
"Getting to the point leave no room for uncertainty or grey area and prevents you from getting sucked in to an awful long texting conversation."
Liz says there's no need to be rude but now you have gone your separate ways it's time to reflect that in your text conversations.
"You're a busy (person) and I'm sure your ex is too so there's no need to waste anyone's time," she says.
Step 4: Avoid Relationship Talk
You broke up for a reason - remember that. Don't get dragged into rehashing old ground. Liz says don't even get pulled into using old pet names or talking about the good old times.
"Don't use quirky old pet names or baby-talk text. Avoid emoticons at all cost. You are now two adults who are communicating via a message made up of text. No one needs to write out kitten noises," she says.
Step 5: Quit While You're Ahead
If you've managed to get through texting your Ex without a cataclysmic event then quit while the world is still spinning. Liz says to not carry the conversation any further than absolutely necessary.
"If you managed to get through texting your ex-girlfriend unscathed, then just stop. Did you congratulate her on graduating and she said "Thank you?" Okay, stop. Did she confirm that, yes, that was her old friend from circus camp you ran into? Okay, stop. Did she not respond to your text message whatsoever? Okay, stop. You just have to stop texting before someone makes a fool of themselves (especially you)," she says.
The Bully is chasing you Ex texting tips. Leave a comment below.
Liz's full article is here: http://www.autostraddle.com/there-must-be-at-least-five-ways-to-text-your-ex-girlfriend-138626/