Lifestyle

Roller derby isn't a sport

I UPSET a colleague last week when I observed that, photogenic as it undoubtedly was, roller derby should not have featured in this newspaper's sports pages.

I upset him more when I offered the opinion that roller derby is at best a crude amusement.

After the initial anger had subsided he invited me to define sport.

That's tricky. I can tell you what I consider to be important sports: football (the real one with the round ball), cricket, the rugby codes, tennis and athletics, but then I am happy to acknowledge that in sport, as in many aspects of life, I am a boring traditionalist.

You will notice that these sports combine finely honed skills, finesse, strategy and guile and to excel at them requires a high degree of strength and fitness. I accept without debate that there are many more activities that deserve to be respected as sports, but which don't hold much interest for me.

Reluctantly I'll admit that basketball counts, although I'll argue long and hard that it is a game invented so those who are freakishly tall and ungainly have something to do during PE.

But I digress. Let's return to the subject of roller derby which my enthusiastic colleague describes as the fastest growing sport in the world. Yeah, right.

As far as I can tell it involves a number of well-built young women in various stages of undress, roller skating with malicious intent. I have no doubt that there is an element of sweaty physicality involved and there might be some tactics employed. But, basically, it looks like an excuse for violence and brutality with a dubious element of perversion thrown in for salacious pleasure.

I concede this spectacle drew a crowd. It's natural that some people were curious and I wouldn't be at all surprised if some strange men went along to ogle the scantily attired participants in the hope that various bouncy bits might fall free of their inadequate harnesses.

In the end I think that there is one guiding principle to clinch the argument. If it involves wearing fishnet stockings then, however sporty the players might appear, they are not taking part in a sport.

Topics:  opinion roller derby league



Date nights under $50

ACCORDING to The Bachelor falling in love involves helicopter rides, private jets, shopping trips, and we mustn’t forget the hot tubs.

Brisbane's arts and culture events centre stage

You loved the film, now you're about to love the musical. Don't miss The Bodyguard The Musical in Brisbane this July.

THE arts and culture events you don't want to miss.

Homewares stores to fulfil your Instagram dreams

No Caption

You too can become an Insta-star with these fab stores.

Top 10 Brisbane experiences to cross off your bucket list

Do yourself a favour and get amongst the food truck scene. Eat Street is a great place to start.

A GOOD bucket list doesn’t have to span continents or cost millions.

Six mega sporting events you need to be at this year

Don't miss all the action trackside this season.

IF THERE is one thing Brisbane does damn well, it’s play host.

Insider’s guide to the best rooftop bars

Eleven Rooftop Bar is one to put on your hit list.

SEE the world from a different perspective...

Where to get your hands on the best wings

Try out these bad boys at Buffalo Bar.

IS THERE anything better than a wicked bowl of chicken wings? Nope.

OPINION: Rocky travelers can't let terrorism change plans

SCENE: Police outside Piccadilly station

THIS is why I'm not changing my plans for my dream holiday.

We don't need royalties freebie: Adani

ENDLESS JOBS: A massive Central Queensland FIFO-base for Adani's $21 billion mine is expected to flood bring 1500 jobs.

ADANI confirms mine will be money-maker without $320m concession.

Browne Park neighbour on the fence about stadium upgrade

WAITING: Roland Leo needs more details regarding the proposed stadium.

Browne Park resident is waiting for planning details to be released.

Local Partners

Browne Park neighbour on the fence about stadium upgrade

The Browne Park expansion plan was welcomed by nearby neighbour Roland Leo but he's withholding judgment till he reads the planning details.


Win a $1000

GROCERY GIFT CARD!
Learn More

What to expect at Birds of Tokyo's Ipswich gig

The band will perform at the Racehorse Hotel on Friday.

BAND member Glen Sarangapany talks music, pub grub and doing shoeys

Bouldy Bush Ballad Bash a country treat

GREAT WEEKEND EVENT: Keith Jamieson at the Bouldy Bush Ballad Bash.

Country music festival to feature Jeff Brown

Revving up for Classics next weekend

Classics by the Coast, Bell Park, Emu Park

Engines set to roar at Emu Park family day out next weekend

Concert death toll revised up to 22, tour suspended

TWENTY-TWO people have been killed and at least 59 people have been injured following a terror attack in Manchester

Grief counselling medium links the living and the dead

MEDIUM: Charmaine Wilson helps the bereaved through the grieving process.

Medium helping bereaved to find closure from the grieving process.

Casual Keanu says fame is ‘cool’

Keanu Reeves in a scene from the movie John Wick: Chapter 2.

NOBODY expected much of John Wick when it was released in 2014.

Ariana Grande breaks her silence after fatal blast

According to reports quoting witnesses, a mass emergency evacuation was prompted after explosions were heard at the end of US singer Ariana Grande's concert in the arena.

The entertainment industry is in shock after attack on concert

Pitch Perfect star suing Woman’s Day over ‘liar’ articles

Actor Rebel Wilson outside court on Friday.

REBEL Wilson's career destroyed by grubby campaign, court hears.

Seven Year Switch: The boner to end all boners

Johnny’s outraged over claims he has a cracked boner.

She gulps. Her face says it all.

Bay to star in Hollywood shark thriller ‘Cage Dive’

Cage Dive, written and directed by Gerald Rascionato, is now screening in the United States of America. It had scenes filmed in Hervey Bay.

And our visiting humpback whales also make appearance.

One of Maryborough's most historic homes is still for sale

FULL OF HISTORY: Trisha Moulds is owner of the historic Tinana state known as Rosehill. The beautiful home is currently for sale.

It has been the scene of both joy and tragedies over the years.

The face of the Sunshine Coast's overpriced rental crisis

Alyx Wilson had to rent a $385 unit in Currimundi because the market was too competitive for cheaper rental housing. She is now renting a room from friends who own a house in Currimundi, and says its much more affordable.

Young people feel the strain in competitive, expensive rental market

WATCH: Take a tour of a tradie's dream home

5a Bruce Hiskens Court, Norman Gardens, going for $720,000. INSET: Lea Taylor.

Huge block with potential for anything

Deputy Premier makes massive call on controversial sand mine

Aerial view of the proposed Forest Glen sand mine.

BREAKING: State Government makes huge call on Coast sand mine plans

Ready to SELL your property?

Post Your Ad Here!